Can I TRUST you?

Can I trust you?

I often wonder how people develop trust in a relationship, whether it’s a romantic, friendly or work relationship. At what moment do we say ‘OK I can trust this moutherfucker’ (Yes I said Mofo).

The truth is every one is unworthy of our trust until we give them that trust.

For me trust in my personal relationship comes quicker than I want. I’ve noticed that I can feel at easy and trust someone with in a few weeks of knowing them.

As soon as that person lets me down I feel betrayed, hurt, stupid, upset; yes a whole book of emotions comes up but mostly I feel betrayed; as if the other person had signed a contract on how our relationship would go down.

Is it too much to ask ?

Is is too much to ask the other person in the relationship to stick to the unwritten and unspoken contract, I’ve made up in my head ?

I want to agree with myself and say NO it’s not too much to ask. But the truth is YES, it’s too much to ask.

All I can do is be honest with myself and TRUST myself. Trust myself to make mistakes and correct myself, trust that I will do what is right for me.

And maybe just maybe I can start practicing what I preach. If I preach communication, hey I can start using those practices.

Maybe it can go something like this

ME: I want you’re honest opinion and always appreciate it when you come to me first before making a decision that affects me. I trust you and I want to gain your trust.

FRIEND: No problem, I can do that.


Stay Beautiful

Mercedes E. Cruz



Pros and Cons

As we enter the Fall Season here in the East Coast of the U.S.,the weather is slowly starting to change; temperatures going down, hurricanes are passing by, school is back in session.

This week I watched my husband work with the public, with people who for the most part could care less about the amount of physical and mental energy goes into the food service industry.

Through their actions and words they abused him and he did what he does best when dealing with the public; and kept his composure; no smiles, no fake laugh, just the same great quality for each and every customer.

Working in the food industry is one of his many passions, he enjoys working with people and he understands the side affects of that industry.

Knowing the industry you are most interested in also means knowing the side effects or the “cons”.

Knowing what you’re pros and cons are is also part of the homework.

Stay Beautiful
Mercedes Cruz




Comfort Zone

I have been for the last few weeks contemplating my next move both in my personal life and in my professional career.

Sometimes the topic of “professional career” makes me uncomfortable.

The same reason you would feel uncomfortable doing something you totally disliked and felt forced because of your circumstance.

I for one really , really, dislike working for a company that adds no value to this planet. That’s where I am now starving for release from my day job to branch out on my own.

Just like a newborn I want to run as soon as I can stand, but like the adult that I am, my subconscious pulls me by the collar when it’s old programing calculates that my actions are not in line with the old me.

all-progress-takes-place-outside-the-comfort-zoneBut this place my mind clings to with such fear no longer exist, in fact it’s never existed. It was the famous comfort zone.

This comfort zone no longer exist in my mind because I turned on the light yes I hit the light switch and it all disappeared.

The room was empty, clean of all the pictures, songs, dances, places and people I had placed in there.

And so I realized that this “comfort zone” is this room in our heads that through programming we design.

You throw everything in there, what you think, see and do then you go about your like, but this room is still there in your mind walking around with you.

I opened the door to this room and turned on the light and here I am standing in a big empty room.

When I walk around I realize it’s more than one room and that I control what goes in these rooms

By leaving the door open I leave myself open to a better me, happier, more out going me with the potential to do and be anything I see.

Comfort Zone goodbye and good night.

Mercedes Cruz
Stay Beautiful


Come and Talk to Me

Often times when I get up in the morning I feel so grateful for another day on this planet. Other days I forget to give thanks and go straight into work and to do list mode.

I also notice that as I get older, I get wiser. Realizing that to do list and my email will always be there, that the real important things are the people in my life the moments I spend with them and the relationships I create with new people in my life.

Communication is such an important aspect of my life. It’s also an underrated aspect.

Yes talking to your self i.e. affirmations, mantras and journal writing are part of communication. In my view the must important communication we have is with ourselves.

What I think, tell myself and say to others about myself make up who I am.

So yes next time you are worried, scared, mad or just want to talk start with yourself “Come and Talk to Me”. The” Me”  being you.


Thank you dear reader for taking time to read my blog post. If you have comments, suggestions, ideas please do share.

Wishing you a fabulous week.

Mercedes Cruz


THE SOB that Lives Inside of ME

For those of you readers who have been subscribing to my email for a while you know that I dated my husband for a few years before we recently wed (June 2016).

During my time blogging which has been over a year now, I share with my readers personal information both about myself and my husband.

This sharing of my personal life is not for you but for me.

On that note most of not all the things we as humans do is to satisfy our own ego, yes from helping others to having children its all part of our wants and need.

Our want to be seen and our need to do or control, there’s nothing wrong with it all, it’s all part of our life.

When we peel away at the story we tell ourselves about how and why we are who we are we realize its all about the EGO.

However when we want to accomplish anything of significance to us, for example:

  • Creating goals
  • Moving forward
  • Obtaining your goals

For that you need that SOB ( SON OF A BI&$H ) that lives inside of you to come out and play. Yes when your inner SOB joins you know you’re going some where and that you aren’t coming back empty handed.

So join me in saying THANK YOU to that SOB that lives inside of you and ME. 🙂

Stay Beautiful

Mercedes E. Cruz

I welcome comments, questions and suggestions.

Had I Not

The following Poem is dedicated to my husband/partner/personal counselor.


Had I not listened to you

I would’ve

I could’ve

and should’ve

So many times so little space to make mistakes

But just maybe I would have

never been with you

or could’ve wake up next to you every morning.

Maybe I should’ve, but didn’t

and I’m so glad I didn’t

listen to you.

Because I get to wake up next to you everyday

2015-10-24 19.18.17





Freedom to Live and Be You

To often for many of us,no matter where on this beautiful planet, our freedoms are abused and/or neglected.

I want to start off by saying Happy 4th of July to those celebrating this holiday.

May your romantic relationships lead to a life long partnerships, with movie nights filled with all the popcorn you can eat.

Freedom in my relationship with my new husband means being myself and in turn he does the same.

It also means choosing to spend the rest of our time together on our journey as man and women, two individuals with different ideas, goals and likes that come and work together while placing kindness, respect and personal growth as the guides for their journey.

I am wishing all my readers, regardless of gender, race and current economic standing a beautiful life, filled with the love, respect and freedom from both self and societal limitations.

Mercedes E. Cruz
Sending love and wishes for a fun-filled extended weekend.

Given a Chance

Dear Mercedes Cruz Romance Readers,

Yesterday my wonderful partner and I wed in a small ceremony with close friends and family.

When I first met my partner, I gave him a chance, we dated,argued, slowed down, and even seriously contemplated breaking up on several occasions.

Through it all we continued to move forward in our lives; me publishing my stories and he getting his college degree.

Given a chance we can all work together.

Partnerships aren’t created over night, they’re created when the storm gets it’s worse, when you’re both holding on to a bag full of rocks while staring up at the top of the mountain.

We are proof that when two people are determined to get to the same place together, every obstacle steps aside and they move forward.

I wish you dear reader no matter your self-imposed title (single,dating, friends, married) a romantic relationship filled with Joy, Respect and above all Personal Growth.

With Love and Respect
Mercedes E. Cruz

Try, Meet and Greet (How doing things together brings us closer)

Summer is here, and that means more outdoor activities, including concerts, cook-outs, new places to visit.

As one half of my partnership with my fiancé; and future husband, I am the one almost always reading about events happening in our city. Including concerts, plays, free events, new exhibits,new places to eat, a new meal to try.

Basically I’m up for trying anything once or more if I like it. I feel the need to learn on a constant basis and trying new things together as a couple is part of that learning constantly.

Also being local tourist is less expensive than traveling for us; as least for now as we prepare for our up coming wedding.

The other part of this is meeting new people, meeting up with old friends and family, doing these activities strengthens both our own personal relationship with ourselves as individuals and our partnership.

The last part is greet, yes greet. As humans we are naturally curious and by staying open to the new and unknown we continue to learn and grow.

By greeting the unknown with an open mind we are forced to consider the world from a different point of view if only for a moment.

Thank you dear reader,

Stay Beautiful

Mercedes E. Cruz

P.S. Stay Tuned, I have been working on a wonderful short e-book for couples. It will be released soon and will be offered on my blog for a limited time. I will be sending out a separate email with the link.




Keeping Your Fears (Exercise for couples)

Yes fears are real, really annoying. Every day I face a fear sometimes a new one or even an old fear that lingers around like a shadow waiting for me to wake up to show me it’s still alive and well.

I have several fears they mainly consist of the usual things, money, weight, the past and the future. Some of these are things I can’t control, like my past or my future. However I can prepare how I will react, by facing my fears.

Fear is a feeling of perceived danger or threat. So I have allowed this feeling of “perceived” danger so partake in my daily thoughts.

Finally I no longer want to allow my fears to keep driving my daily decisions, so I have decide on a new course of action. It involves keeping fear around, yes keeping fear around (you read that right).

However Mr. and Mrs. Fear will no longer live in my head but on paper.

Writing my fears down and seeing it on paper will allow me to address it, by addressing it and replacing my fears. For every fear I write I will write a new sentence that replaces it with a new clear and positive joy filled one.

My goal is to eradicate one fear every week. I’m guessing some fears might take longer and others might take me less time.

But if this exercise works, we (fiancé and I) will be closer and stronger as a couple.

So go ahead try this exercise with me and keep your fear on paper.


  1. Get a note-book, piece of paper, fancy napkin (if you can write on it and carry it with you it works).
  1. Write down your top 3 fears (leaving plenty of space between each sentence).
  1. Underneath the first fear write a new sentence. This new sentence should reflect how you want to feel and should make you feel good about yourself when you read it out loud. The word “I am” is an important part of this new sentence.
  1. Read your new sentence to yourself daily, several times a day for one whole week, carry it with you everywhere. (You might want to take a picture of the sentence, write it in your notes on you smart phone).

P.S. Let me know what you think of this exercise, or if you have any thoughts or ideas of your own about dealing with fear.

Most importantly if you do the exercise please share in the comments below.

Stay Beautiful

Mercedes Cruz